On Monday I start my fifth first in human trial. It is, at best, a crapshoot.
Talk about not knowing if you are coming or going. Realistically, I am in a tough spot. Stability just doesn’t cut it these days—I need response.
If wishes were horses and if my ever growing to do list were enough to keep me here…But that’s not how this works.
It is time to get my will finished, even as I start a new painting. Feet in both worlds, now and nevermore. I am not ready. But I also understand that death is not open to negotiation.
The trick is keeping hope alive. And hoping my body follows suit.
life and breath: outliving lung cancer 